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I took this shot of Steve at The Assembly in Cape Town on 29th Dec 2010 on a PENTAX 120mm film camera. It’s one of a few shot i didn’t lightmeter for, and one of a few that came out.. I guess sometimes it’s better just to guess.

I’m be seeing these guys again this weekend and i’ll be guessing a lot too.. Since i’ll be shooting with my pinhole camera!

Looking forward to catching up and looking forward to the results! Hope to see as many of you as possible in the daisy fields this weekend!

Welcome to the weekend!




This was written in a little mini-city called Reading in the UK, it features in one of my favourite books REDmoonRISING, and it has become the home of one of my best friends in the world and his beautiful wife. So this little mini-city has a place in my heart. On route back to CapeTown from the USofA in April 2006 I popped into the mini-city and sat with a church..they gather in a gym hall and against the pulpit was a neon cross, like the neon they make “fish ‘n chips” signs from..was it cool, haha..put it this way I felt like I was in a anyway, I began to scrible, and these were my thoughts..


there’s a disco cruxifiction against the pulpit tonight.
candles on the tables,
and rollerrink spots…
the people are simple lifed.
they love,
they laugh.
they do love and
they do laugh.
i have nothing bad to say of them…
will this church change the world?
probably not…
but who cares.
i reckon they have more of a chance of changing a life
than those churches set on changing the world…
and you never know…
that life may change the world.
yup, i could believe that!
will this church change the world?
yeah, they will.


grace has covered me

but it’s sheets run off my body
i walk exposed with shame
and my reach is insufficient.

i can’t remember if it fell,
or of it was taken
but it is gone
and not even the thief knows her crime.

(written on 06 April 2006)



you have lied to me.

or, am i mistaken.
it doesn’t really matter…
does it?
party here, meet nowhere
work day, park at night
i’ve walked a mile in your shoes,
you breathed lies the whole way
then comfort you found
and i and your shoes stayed at the door.
is it really so hard?
am i really that heavy?
or are you just too weak.
am i blind…
can i see no more?
did we destroy eachother
was there no masterplan
or was it as i feel
that your gene’s are too cruel,
to self absorbed
to soaked
i guess you just leaked in my hand
and if it were not i
it would have been another
for even the dryest leak.

do you hurt?
do you cry?
do you feel my hurt
or is it something you deny…
do you care?
your selfishness has eaten me
for this expressions die.
will i rise?
as always, as before
but i wish to never come here again
i wish no-one to come here
and i wish no-one had been.

we were fools.

(written on 31 March 2006)




last night the devil wore my fingerprints.

i was guilty.
my being defined evil.
it snuck, it breathed silent infestation under the covers,
but nothing could hide my guilt.
i was sin bred, breeding.
i had handed over my number
and i had called.
there was nothing in my mind,
except the escape from shame
which only served to fuel it.
i was sin incarnate,
i was dead – i am dead.
the life that had me has left me.
i left it outside my first step
and it could not fight it,
it would not.
yet, it was not defeated
only the conquered cast shadows,
and my shadow was long.

(written on 14 March 2006)


..well, here’s where things get a little hard to introduce. I wrote this one the morning after as I sat up in bed in Michigan.. You might find the next few to just be posted without an explanation. If you really want to know, catch me over a jack ‘n lime at the local and we’ll have a chat. but for now here it is..


you can’t beat the devil
once you’ve freed the mind
you’re on it’s side
you can’t hide
the evidence has your fingerprints on
and it wears them with confidence
don’t raise your head
it looks for you
forget life, forget your plans
it’s time to run.
you can’t hide
it looks for you
the devil has your fingerprints.

(written on 14 March 2006)




I wrote this whilst under a blanket on a couch in Grand Rapids, Michigan. It was mid-March, it was freazing outside, Longview was on repeat on the stereo..and these were my thoughts..


another night and my phone remains silent.
what does it take to make it ring?
i tried, i do try…
nothing. nobody nowhere
not even one soul…

well none that i can hear.

last night started out great.
but it ended the same as all the others.
defeated and all alone.

the fence sucks!
but so do both sides of it.
i wish there never was a fence,
no division, no partition…just people, humans…
soul to soul, body to body.
the touch of a hand.
the warmth of her finger tips, if only for a second,
if only an accident

i felt alive.
i felt loved.
i felt worth.
what i felt…was a mistake.
was it a mistake?

only the mind of one knows,
and i am not the one.

land of the free,
home of the brave…
i am locked inside this house and my courage is disarmed.

what do i have to do to get it back…
not my courage, not even my freedom
what do i have to do to get it back.

i am robbed, i am scared.
but you will not see this scar,
for the others hide it.

thanks. thank YOU!

(written on 13 March 2006)





this was the first official THE JOURNAL OF A SMILE post on myspace, it’s written as an ode to a great man that gave up everything, leaving all his family and friends in central africa to be with us in south africa, and after being diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to remained in the last place he believed God instructed him to be despite the pleads of his family and friends back home. I had spent june in mozambique down the zambezi delta with some amazing people and upon returning to south africa we recieved the news that our friend had passed away. today his body is laid in south africa, the land he was called to serve in..this is the least I could offer..


money lay on the floor,
the cuts on my finger meant nothing.
our brother had stood at deaths door and entered in.

oh, our sacrifice.
oh, our pain.
how quickly we forget Christ,
Christ, our only gain.

we rejoice in this, we rejoice in that.
we lay claim to this we lay claim to that.
but what is ours?

what sacrifice is yours in comparison to Christ’s?
in comparison?
in comparison!

what lies we believe,
that we have given much.
when did we go hungry, get tortured, or had to much of life?

the sun rose,
and the sun set.
my life today is as if I had never left.

is the Lord good?
I have no doubt.
Therefore, our brother I know will walk death out.

Christ is his life,
and to die was gain.
I only know of one sacrifice,
that endures again and again.

in memory of our brother Matheus ( – 2005)


















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